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目标分解持之以恒放手提升孩子抗挫能力
2020-01-07 23:50  www.fxwindowfilm.com

从宝宝学走路迈出第一步,到学龄前学习用筷子、系鞋带,再到上学后钻研难题、进行人际交往、学习钢琴游泳等特长,孩子在不同年龄段会遇到需要不断跨越的困难。事实上,孩子的成长过程就是不断遇到挑战、克服困难的过程,家长要做的,不是帮孩子摆平一切,而是要学会放手,让他们独自面对挑战。

From baby learning to walk the first step, to preschool learning to use chopsticks, tie shoelaces, and after school to study difficult problems, interpersonal communication, learning piano swimming and other special skills, children in different age groups will encounter difficulties that need to be constantly crossed. In fact, the process of children's growth is the process of constantly meeting challenges and overcoming difficulties. What parents have to do is not to help their children fix everything, but to learn to let go and let them face the challenge alone.

孩子上学后,就步入了社会化。幼儿园时,除了日常自理能力,还要学习各种本领面对和适应周围的环境;小学及中学阶段,要应对升学挑战和人际关系……看似“艰难”重重,但这些挑战却能带来非常好的教育效果。比如,孩子克服了困难,掌握了方法,就会获得一份掌控感,并从中找到自信。孩子每经历一次小挫折时,都会想办法找到突破口,而这种体验,会为他日后应对更大的挑战提供底气和信心。这种螺旋式的上升,才能培养出有抗挫能力的孩子。反之,不让孩子面对挫折,家长什么事儿都提前想好,提前扫清障碍,孩子受挫后,首先想到的就会是放弃。这在心理学中称之“习得性无助”。

When children go to school, they are socialized. In kindergarten, in addition to the daily self-care ability, but also to learn a variety of skills to face and adapt to the surrounding environment; primary and secondary, to meet the challenges of higher education and interpersonal relationships. It may seem \"tough \", but these challenges can be very educational. For example, when a child overcomes difficulties and has mastered methods, he gains a sense of control and self-confidence. Every time a child experiences a small setback, he will find a way to find a breakthrough, and this experience will provide him with the courage and confidence to meet the bigger challenges in the future. This spiral rise is the only way to produce children with the ability to resist setbacks. On the other hand, do not let children face setbacks, parents think of everything ahead of time, clear the obstacles ahead of time, children frustrated, the first thought will be to give up. This is called \"learned helplessness\" in psychology.

放手让孩子面对挑战并不是说让家长当甩手掌柜,而是要在平时教育中帮孩子锻炼勇气、打造信心。这里给家长们提供一套方法:1.先帮孩子制订可以实现的目标。可以轻松实现的目标,心理学称之为“就近发展区”,也就是“跳一跳”就可以达到的目标,其本质是目标分解。以小学一年级的学跳绳为例,如果一下子定了跳100个的目标,就会吓倒孩子。不如说:“来,我们先来跳一个!”当孩子跳1个后,就称赞他:“看,我们做到了!”关键是父母要看到孩子的努力,切勿只看孩子的不足。2.持之以恒,每天坚持练习。当孩子能跳5个乃至10个时,就要问孩子一个重要的问题——“你是如何做到的?”孩子很可能会说,“我不知道”。这时,父母要及时帮孩子总结,是不是我们每天坚持练习,用了正确方法——落地时脚尖着地,手臂弧形摇绳……孩子会点头确认,并内化到心里。3.和孩子约定“胜利”的表示动作。一同设计一个小手势,例如击掌表示“耶,练习就是有用”。每当做成一件事时,就和孩子一起做这个动作。久而久之,亲子间可以形成一种默契,这对孩子也是一种莫大的心理支持。“练习就是有用”就像一颗种子,种在了孩子心里,日后会慢慢发芽长大。如果父母只是空洞地说,“妈妈相信你,你是最棒的!”却缺少了克服困难的整个过程,对孩子是没有任何帮助的。

Letting children face challenges is not about letting parents lose their hands, but about building courage and confidence in their normal education. Here's a way for parents:1. Start by helping your child set achievable goals. The goal that can be easily achieved, which psychology calls the "nearest development zone ", is the goal that the" jump "can achieve, its essence is the goal decomposition. Take the first-grade school jump rope as an example, if the goal of jumping 100 is set at once, it will frighten the child. Let's say," Come on, let's jump first!" When the child jumped one, he praised him:" Look, we did it!" The key is for parents to see the child's efforts, do not only look at the child's shortcomings. 2。 Persevere and practice every day. When a child can jump five or even 10, ask the child an important question -" How did you do that?" The child would probably say," I don't know ". At this time, parents should help their children to sum up, whether we practice every day, with the right method-toes landing on the ground, arm arc rocking rope. The child will nod to confirm and internalize into the heart. 3。 The gesture of agreeing to "victory" with the child. Design a small gesture together, such as a high-five to indicate "yeah, practice is useful ". Whenever you do something, do it with your child. Over time, parents and children can form a tacit understanding, which is also a great psychological support for children. "Practice is useful" is like a seed, planted in the child's heart, will slowly sprout and grow. If the parents just say empty," mother believes you, you are the best!" But the lack of the whole process of overcoming difficulties is of no help to the child.

需要提醒的是,当孩子面对挑战胆怯、灰心,觉得自己不行时,要帮孩子建立成长型思维。比如,孩子说“我就是学不好数学”“我背英语单词就是慢,总记不住”时,家长首先要认同孩子的情绪,可以对孩子说,“数学真的很难““英语单词不容易背的”,千万不要说“这有什么难的”。因为只有认同了孩子的情绪,才能和孩子心灵相通。下一步,告诉孩子,“你可能暂时还没有学到正确的方法,我们来看看如何找到它!”这句话就像为孩子打开一扇窗户,让他能看到“光”,并且沿着你的指向去寻找。▲

It should be reminded that when children face challenges timid, discouraged, feel that they cannot, to help children build a growth-oriented thinking. For example, when a child says "I just can't learn math "," I can't memorize English words, I can't remember ", parents should first identify with their children's emotions and say," Maths is really hard" English words aren't easy to memorize. Because only by identifying with the child's emotions can we communicate with the child's heart. Next, tell the child," you may not have learned the right way yet, let's see how to find it!" This sentence is like opening a window for a child to see "light" and follow your direction to find it. ▲

看高血压是咋一步步弄坏心脏的5种方法降血压动脉血管内压力过高,心脏排血的阻力就会增大,久而久之会逐渐引起心室壁肥厚。之后,其运动会变的呆滞、不灵活、不协调,对心脏泵血功能造成影响,严重时可因心脏舒张能力变差导致心衰。

See hypertension is how step by step damage to the heart of the five ways to lower blood pressure arterial pressure is too high, the resistance to cardiac blood excretion will increase, over time will gradually cause hypertrophy of the ventricular wall. Later, its exercise will become dull, inflexible, uncoordinated, to the heart pump blood function, severe may be due to the heart diastolic ability to lead to heart failure.

止打嗝、防老花、解腰痛这些小窍门有大用掐攒竹止打嗝。攒竹穴在面部,眉毛内侧眉头凹陷处。取坐位,双手放于桌上,双手拇指食指指尖立起,低头闭目,用力掐攒竹穴,由于指尖受力面小,局部很容易就会有酸胀感。每次坚持10秒钟,可轻轻放松一下,反复掐至少5次。

Stop hiccups, prevent old age, relieve waist pain these tips have big use to save bamboo to stop hiccups. Zanzhu point in the face, eyebrow inside the brow depression. Take the sitting position, hands on the table, hands thumb food finger pointed up, bow closed eyes, hard to save bamboo hole, because the fingertips force small, local will easily have a feeling of acid expansion. Hold on for 10 seconds each time, can gently relax, repeatedly pinch at least 5 times.

冬季热水泡脚有4大好处,但这5类人需谨慎泡脚是中医的一种养生保健方法,具有加快血液循环、刺激穴位、解乏散寒之功效,同时还能提高人体免疫力,帮助抵御各种疾病。

Winter hot water foot bubble has four major benefits, but these five categories of people need to be careful foot bubble is a health care method of traditional Chinese medicine, with the ability to speed up blood circulation, stimulate acupoints, relieve cold, but also improve human immunity, help resist various diseases.